Currently Browsing: GOP 2012

JUST IN: Romney is a Great. Big. Pansy.

According to Hot Air, Romney won’t debate Ole Newt one-on-one, because doing so would be equivalent to narrowing the race to two when there are still so many “viable, important candidates” in the race.


I don’t blame the former Massachusetts Governor. Without the filler candidates to give him a breather, Newt would likely crash Romney’s hard drive .



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Hey Iowa – Cut It Out!

Dear Iowa Republicans:

Haha! Very funny, guys. I can appreciate a good joke as well as anyone, but don’t you guys think you’re taking this whole “President Ron Paul” thing just a little too far? I realize it’s freezing balls up there, but a nuclear Iran would most likely heat things up a bit too much.

Those of us who reside in less “important” – a.k.a. locked-down Red states (you know, the ones w/large numbers of electoral votes; the states that provide untold campaign donations – like Texas) – would really appreciate it if you folks didn’t drop the ball on this one. Thanks so much.



Republicans Everywhere Else




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No, Newt Dismisses Her Because She's Ridiculous. . .

The second I saw the headline for this article,  my blood began to boil. Then I laughed, because I realized – holy crap, THIS author has a job at All of a sudden, I’m seeing bright future for myself in freelance writing. . .

In a stirring bit of originality and Pulitzer-grade journalism, Tina Korbe states that Bachmann isn’t at the top of the polls,  because. . .  she’s female. She then backs her stance by quoting Joe Scarborough from MSNBC. Now doesn’t that just scream ‘factually unbiased’?  It couldn’t be the fact that she constantly panders to the Tea Party, while ignoring intellectual conservatives? No way. How’s about the fact that she drones on and on about her record as the single most ineffective Republican congressman in history – and yet she doesn’t even notice she’s getting all braggadocios about her failures?  No, that couldn’t be it. Could it be that some voters just don’t appreciate her grating, whiny Minnesota accent?

Nope. It must be the fact that she has a uterus.

Gingrich has, in my opinion, been more than courteous. The way he and the other candidates have allowed her to keep spewing her incorrect and baseless nonsense at them for months actually borders on chivalry. Everyone on that stage treats her with kid-gloves. None of them want to look like the big bad guy, getting his jollies from bullying a girl. And of course, she knows it. She’s playing them like any beautiful woman plays any group of men. She knows they can’t strike back, and attempting to point out that she’s dead wrong and lying would just seem so sexist. . .

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. . .

Michele Bachmann is the affirmative action, throw-women-a-bone-because-Palin-didn’t-show, let’s-all-nod-and-smile and patronize the hell out of her candidate.


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Running 3rd Party? Not Cool.

During last night’s debate, the lovely and wonderful Megyn Kelly asked Ron Paul, point blank – would he agree to support the GOP nominee when if he doesn’t get the nomination? Of course, Paul refused to answer the very pointed question, and instead rambled on and on about what distinguishes him from the rest of the candidates.

What bothers me about this answer, and the fact that Paul very well may run as an independent, is that many state and local Republican parties have spent a great deal hosting and promoting all 1,321,534 debates since September. Paul has benefited from this airtime and the ensuing commentary as much as any other candidate. Why is it just hunky dory for him to – after losing the GOP nomination – decide to run as an independent, and undoubtedly take votes from the Republican nominee?

I think the state and local Republican parties in Iowa and other important primary states could fix this problem. Why not make it a prerequisite to primary debate participation that candidates agree to back the Republican nominee – even if it isn’t them? Make it a contractual agreement. If Republican’s are paying to give you tons of visibility and airtime, you should agree not to run against a Republican just because you lose.

Why I Dream of Karate Chopping Ron Paul Supporters

When I was at Texas Tech, the student body took great pride in our reputation as the “most offensive fans” in the Big 12. We’d throw tortillas at you and tear down the goal posts if we beat you. We boasted that our coach, the revered Pirate, Mike Leach, was rumored to drink during games – which explained his propensity to go for it on a 4th and 12. Most teams call in the 2nd team once they get a sizable lead. Not Tech. We beat Nebraska 75-10 during my freshmen year. (What?! It was HOMECOMING!)

To be honest, we were so offensive because 90% of the time, we were the underdogs. When you compete in a conference with football dynasties like Texas, OU and Nebraska, it’s tough to get any R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Drunk college kids getting rowdy over a football game is one thing, but Ron Paul supporters are the “most offensive fans” in the GOP, and it’s destroying his credibility with the rest of the Right.

Listen, Paulians - we GET it. You love Ron Paul for his economic policies, you have full faith that he’s the 2nd coming & he alone can save America. (And you really, really want the right to smoke your pot without government intervention…) Cool. I – and I think most conservatives – agree with Ron Paul on almost 90% of the issues. It’s the 10% on which he is bat sh*t crazy that terrifies us.  He’s great when it comes to the economy and the Constitutional role of the federal government. I’d even agree with him on gay rights and marijuana, although a lot of conservatives wouldn’t. When he talks about foreign policy, however, I want to have him tested for dementia.

You guys acting like it’s your sole purpose in life to Occupy Twitter and attack anyone who hints at supporting another candidate is killing your cause. The more times I’m told that Newt Gingrich is a Marxist, or that Perry is for genetic engineering, the more I think you guys are wearing tin foil hats. The hit piece on Newt put out by Paul’s campaign yesterday just made it worse. Mockarena over at has it right – Paul’s people do fight like teenage girls.

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